Bye Bye 2010

Well Christmas has past and the year 2010 is in the history books. Aside from the leaps and bounds I've made discovering myself, it has been a rather uneventful year for me. I've made some new friends, good ones too, and lost a job. I saw more live music this past year than I have ever seen before. I suppose all in all it was a good year.

Despite that, December has been utter torment upon my very being. Work has taken it's toll on me and I am worn out past being worn out. All I've done is work and sleep. When I'm awake I can't keep my mind focused on anything long enough to do something. I feel almost like a mindless drone who has been running on Monster Energy the whole month. I've had a few days break now and I'm starting to feel more like myself again.

The new year has arrived. I don't usually see this as a really big event, sorta like the going away party for Christmas every year. All the decorations are put away, stores have one last big sale event, all the festivities come to a close, and the calendar tells us we have ended an age and are beginning a new one. Being in the middle of winter, I don't usually see this as a new beginning to anything, other than I have to change calendars. Spring time feels more like rebirth and new beginnings to me, but ohh well.

In spite of that, I have made a few resolutions for the new year. First and foremost, I have decided that I want to drink less alcohol this year. There are a lot of personal reasons behind this, ones that involve family and me not wanting to be like certain people. I'm doing good on this one so far, this was the first New Years in a long while that I did not drink at all. It was very nice to wake up without a headache and go searching for the toilet first thing after I stood up. Second is the ever popular lose weight. Last year I didn't do good on that one, I ended the year the same as when I started, no gain, but no loss either. Third is an easy one, be true to myself. That's pretty much it. They are simple and ones that most likely won't get broken or set aside for next year.

For the time being I am going to take a break from writing captions. I just feel like I've lost my groove and have been out of it. I have, however, been reading captions alot lately. They have bringing back many feelings that I have not felt in some time. Including that burning desire to be female. It feels good to have this feeling, it gives me a sort of peace inside. I feel happy when I can imagine myself as a woman, picture myself in everyday life as a woman. I even had a dream about it last night. It wasn't anything spectacular, just me as a woman walking around at a concert. I do remember the most visual part of this dream was me putting on makeup before leaving the house. That was interesting, I never had that in a dream before, at least that I can remember.

Well that's my little update. Happy New Year to all! :)